Tuesday, 31 January 2017

WHY YOU SHOULD ALWAYS BE KINDER THAN NECESSARY



The inspiration for writing this post came after watching a Zoella vlog and seeing a little framed quote saying "Always try to be a little kinder than necessary". The words rang true with a lot of things I've been hearing recently. I know I shouldn't listen to and take on board everyone's opinions - but I do, and I can't help but let them effect me and my choices. I think a lot of this comes back to my lack of confidence, which got a massive blow about 6 months ago when me and my boyfriend of 9 years went separate ways. I went from being with someone I thought I'd spend my life with, living in a nice (albeit rented) house, with a job I was pretty good at... To suddenly moving back in with the parents 200 miles away, and being well and truly jobless.
After the initial heart ache and a little time away, I started looking for a job just to get me out of the house... but I soon realised I wouldn't be able to answer questions about why I'd moved back home, or had a little gap in employment without having to relive the break up all over again. This is also around the time when a few people started to make little remarks about why I hadn't got a job, and gotten on with my life a little. I tried to take it on the chin as a little joke, no harm intended, right?


Not too long after, I started a Christmas temp job, which I really did not enjoy in the slightest. I got pretty miserable again, and it made me realise I needed to be doing something in a happy, friendly environment with people to match. I don't necessarily NEED a job... I have the most supportive parents who have kindly let me live rent and bill free since moving home - for which I am forever grateful! So, I decided that part time was for me, it would bring in some income and get me out of the house whilst also giving me time to work on this blog, do a few little freelance bits on the side, and allowing me to watch my beloved Homes Under The Hammer and This Morning (yes, I do like to mention this in every blog post!).
You must be thinking where's this all going? Get to the point! Well, I just wanted to explain how I got to writing this post and that it wasn't just a random thought... My own little story and reason behind why we all need to be kinder to each other... So, carrying on a month or so later in comes my new employer! Although I've only been in a couple of times, so far it just feels right (and I hope they end up liking me enough to keep me on!). I was really so pleased I'd got the job, as with my lack of confidence over the past few months I genuinely thought I'd messed up the interview! I finally felt something was going right for me, and to add to this I'd just started getting a few people contact me about blog work, as well as helping out the lovely Penny from The Little Lending Co with some bits for an upcoming event.
Yet here I am, with it all starting to work out and finally feeling a little bit happier again, and I'm still getting these little comments about what I'm doing with my life. "Do you really want to be working there?" "You need a proper full time job!" "You went to University to get that job?" "You're not even getting paid to help her out?!" "Why are you helping with a wedding event after your break up?" and a whole lot more taking the piss out of my blog.
Yes these are comments from people I know. "But I was only joking" they'll say. Okay, but am I laughing? Do you find my life a joke? Is your comment kind? Is your comment necessary? NO. And so here I am, left doubting everything all over again. A lot of people would be able to take the comments and brush them off. But then a lot of them people have more confidence, a lot of them people haven't gone through a break up and feels like they have to start their life again, a lot of them people aren't me. Everyone deals with things differently, takes comments differently, are going through different things to you, which is why I come to the point that you should always be kinder than necessary! Or plain and simple - just don't be a dick.


Let me know if you've ever been on the receiving end of unnecessarily unkind comments! And if you have, any way of dealing with them too! To finish this off I'm going to leave you with a few quotes (found via Pinterest) for you to think of the next time you may think of being unkind to anyone or making that *jokey* comment!...
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"Always show more kindness than seems necessary, because the person receiving it needs it more than you will ever know"
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"Before you speak, ask yourself: is it kind, is it true, is it necessary, does it improve upon the silence?"
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"Choose being kind over being right and you'll be right every time"
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"If a person has ugly thoughts, it begins to show on the face. And when that person has ugly thoughts every day, every week, every year, the face gets uglier and uglier until you can hardly bear to look at it. A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts it will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely"
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"You will never regret being kind"



Outfit:
Topshop Stripe Tee (similar here), Topshop Denim Pinafore Dress, Monki Semi Circle Bag (similar here and here), Superga Polka Dot Platform Trainers

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6 comments:

  1. You inspired me today!!:*thank you :*:*:you are truly strong Don t let anyone tell u any different:*:*:*miss u woman hugs and kisses :x

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    1. aw georgiana! thank you :) miss you lots! hope everything's going well for you!! xxx

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  2. I love your outfit and great post!

    http://www.myclusterofthoughts.com/

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  3. such a lovely post Laura, I love how honest and open you are here on your blog and the blogosphere definitely needs more people like you <3
    I have been on the receiving end of an unkind comment before and like you I just brush them off or take em on the chin but I understand and know from experience myself that its not always the case as some will just get to you
    I think you're so inspiring being able to share your thoughts here and speaking out about being more kind and reading your story as well makes you even more amazing, the fact you pulled yourself together and actually wanted to move on is admirable and those unkind comments are definitely out of place as I think you've been amazing and dont doubt yourself at all cause girl keep doing what your doing and it will pay off and those saying those unnecessary comments are gonna be eating their words after :)
    thanks for this post Laura <3

    http://amelodyofdiaries.blogspot.co.uk/2016/12/christmas-do.html

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    1. this comment has literally made my day - thank you for taking the time to read my post and commenting in such a lovely way! It makes writing such posts worthwhile :) xx

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